Soulmate(s)

How do you know if you’ve met your soulmate? How do you know that this is “the one”?

I believe you have numerous soulmates and that everyone that walks into your life for a reason, a purpose and a lesson.

Some good, some bad.

How does love get stale? How come it’s so easy to just give up and pull out instead of fighting for what you want. Maybe because I have no idea what I want anymore.

I thought I had everything I’ve ever wanted, but now the picture is blurry. I can’t see straight. Am I at another fork in the road? So many directions I don’t know where to go. Left, right, straight. Everything I’ve worked for the past year do I throw away for something new? Will I always be questioning the “what if’s” instead of living by that everything happens for a reason.

For the first time in a long time, I just don’t know what I want.

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Job. Career. Dreams.

The best Advice from my dad:

“You spend majority of your life at work. If you’re doing something you love then it’s not a job.”

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I’m not the only one who has no idea what they want to do with their life career wise but hey I have a variety of ideas.

I put so much pressure on myself to have this beautiful journey of “life” sorted out. Honestly growing up I always thought come 25 I would be starting my family, owning my own home and already married.

WELL NEWS FLASH!

I’m actually SO happy that was not how my life ended up.

I’ve studied 3 courses in college and I am not using any of those skills I paid for with everyday life, but I have so many memories looking back and I truly believe all those memories have helped shaped me into who I am today.

From reading my previous posts we know I’m a waitress and I do 100% know I want out of hospitality. I need a change. A break. A whole new ballgame. I want to expand my brain. Keep me interested. Push myself. Challenge.

Unfortunately not a lot of people will either A) hire me on a working visa and B) hire you without any experience.

So here I am… coming into the end of 2017 and ready to take on a fresh start with 2018. Ready to study online. Ready to really think my options and see what I want to try. Well… I’m the most indecisive human I know. I’m at another crossroad after making pros and cons lists on where to start and what to do.

My mom always pushed me into the direction of college and after completing Social work, Sales and Health care I need to leave her out of my career decision making dilemma.

Something I always wanted to do was communications and plan events or be a spokesperson for a massive industry that helps encourage the world to be a better place. But I don’t want to be in my 30s starting at the bottom of the chain (again with the age vs life’s pressures). Or what about being a journalist I love to write ( “that’s a dead end job”). Something that has become my newer hobby Yoga..why not start yoga Instructing (“there isn’t any money in that it should stay your hobby”).

I.give.up

(Not actually, obvi)

I guess we will have to hold tight and see what the rest of 2017 takes me and begin to be ready for 2018…at this moment in time it’s all a mystery.